Raw and Real: Conversations That Spark Life-Changing Transformations with Jenifer Loehding

This conversation was LIFE CHANGING for me! Jennifer and I spoke about collapsing Confidence with Worthiness. It was a true light bulb moment for me.
She's been a powerful stand for others and has had several successful podcasts.
You are going to LOVE this conversation!

Jennifer Loehding is a success architect, entrepreneur, and certified DreamBuilder Coach dedicated to guiding high-achieving individuals toward holistic success. With over 23 years of entrepreneurial experience, Jennifer helps her clients design sustainable frameworks that support both personal and professional growth. After excelling in the top 2% of a global cosmetic company for 15 years, she transitioned to a new path focused on health and well-being.

Jennifer's own journey is marked by resilience, as she overcame two rare health conditions and achieved remission without long-term medication. By incorporating daily habits that prioritize mental and physical well-being—through nutrition, exercise, and mindset practices—Jennifer has built a thriving, healthy life. She now shares these methods through her coaching and workshops to inspire others.

Jennifer offers a range of coaching programs, including individual and group coaching, as well as transformative workshops. Her programs integrate mind, body, and spirit, empowering clients to create lasting success in all areas of life.

In addition to her entrepreneurial ventures, Jennifer is a podcast host, motivational speaker, author, and passionate advocate for personal growth. Her work helps individuals reach their fullest potential while contributing positively to the world around them.

jenniferloehding.com

https://www.facebook.com/Loehdingblogger/

https://www.linkedin.com/in/jennifer-loehding/

https://www.instagram.com/jenniferloehding

https://www.youtube.com/startergirlz

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Transcript

0:06

Hi everybody. Welcome. Welcome. This is Captivate the Mic with Elaine Williams and I am here with the fabulous and amazing Jennifer Loding and she, oh my god, I saw you in Speakonomics. We both were speaking there in Dallas and you have done so many things, Jennifer. So first of all, for being here. Absolutely. I'm excited to chat with you today, Elaine. It's going to be fun. Yeah. And we got, I got to be on your podcast, over a year ago, you have done, you call yourself a success architect, which I absolutely love. But for people who aren't familiar with you, can you just give us a list, a partial list of all the things? Cause it's so much. Yeah, it's fun. It's funny because I know we're all starting to use chat GPT now for everything, and just to tell you a little story about how I came up with that, I was inputting, I was trying to figure out like, because when I'm doing podcasts and I'm bringing people on my show, I'm trying to give like a bot. Like who are they, who are these people? Some of them come to me with a title. And some of them will have 500 things they do, and I have to figure out how to narrow that down and find the main thing that I want to put out there. I was trying to do the same thing for myself, because I have all these certifications and things that I do, and I feel like I do a lot of different things. They really hone in on one thing, but there's a lot of titles. And I had, I went in one day and just started putting in all these things, and I'm like, give me a name. That would really sum up all of this. And it came back with like success, Maven and all of this. And I'm like, I like success architect. And yeah, so really what I do, I tell people is my main thing is I work with women primarily, but I hope them. overcome subconscious blocks. I help them identify those subconscious blocks and then help them release the emotional ties to them. But I do that with a lot of different modalities. I have a process that I work through, when people come to you, you got to meet them where they are. So I have a lot of tools that my, in my tool belt that I can use. And that's where all those different certifications come in that helped me come up with that cool success architect. I love it. And I know you've coached people on fitness you've overcome health issues. You're a mother of how many? I have three. Three and long marriage. Like you're just a bad ass. Yeah. And I love that you're Oh, you know what? I'm going to go study this. It's funny. I'm right in the middle right now. I'm doing a different psychology course. I am a, I don't know if you're like this, but I continually like to learn things. I really genuinely do. And a lot of it I do is really because I feel personally responsible for how I show up in the world. And I think that the more knowledge that I can bring in and in truth be told, like everything I do, it's I tell people, I have all these fancy things that I've done, but they really, the reason I did them work was about me. I wanted to learn for myself because I was either trying to heal something, work on something, get better at something. And then I realized in the process of that, Hey, this was pretty powerful in my world for me, and then I realized there are probably other people that are struggling with some of the things that, you know, that I've had to learn to overcome. And that's where that's manifested into my work. And so yeah, so I'm studying a psychology course right now. It's funny cause I was doing like a keto course and then I had this supplement course and the psychology course, and then I'm in a mastermind and I was like, Jennifer. You got to breathe for a minute. Just like down one thing at a time, I'm like, I resemble that remark. Yes, I can so relate because, I had three addictions. I'm a sexual assault survivor, domestic violence survivor, and I really probably had more addictions, but, three main ones. And I, but I always think the more I can heal myself, then the greater I can serve even more people. And like I just wrote a chapter for a book and it's all about how I internalized all the shame when I got into flipping houses And 2008 and I was rehabbing three of them when the economy tanked and I got flipped so But I know that women struggle We both work with women primarily as something will happen and so many times we think it's Us. Oh, I'm horrible at tech. I suck at that. And it's no, everybody has trouble with tech. You're not the only one. So is there something you want to talk about that you're really excited about or something that you've been seeing like a, with your clients lately or? Yeah. Yeah. Right now I'm actually one of the biggest things I'm excited about. It's, the certifications and all those are great. Cause I love doing the learning and But I am at the building stage right now of actually building out this offer suite, because I had worked with this mentor and I say worked, I've had mentors, several of them over the years. I was a Mary Kay for 20 years. So I've had mentors probably my entire entrepreneurial career, but I worked with another mentor for two years that helped me put together a big ticket, a high offer course. And. I was so excited about this thing when I got done with it. And then I was like, Oh my gosh, what do I do with this thing? It's a beast. And it's like a 10, 000 program. Who is going to buy a 10, 000 program? And I'm like, Oh, wait a minute. Jennifer did this. But then I had to think about, like where I was when I started my journey, like who was that person, Jennifer, when she began this journey 25 years ago as an entrepreneur and all the investment that I've done over the years, they didn't start at 10, 000 and started down here. And it worked. And so I recently joined a mastermind. I had completed a neurological fitness certification and the gal that put that on was also doing a a mastermind for coaches. And so it was a minimal investment. I was surprised because I thought, this has probably been one of my best value things that I've been in. But what's been really exciting about it is she actually helped me engineer that backwards for the starting client coming into this process and working that all the way up to the high ticket client. And so I say all that to say, somebody listening to this goes, what does all that mean? What I will say when I sum all that up, As I have worked for years to figure out what exactly it was that I was supposed to be doing besides educating and inspiring, like what was the message that I was trying to really drive home the problem that women, I know women are struggling with and what am I trying to solve? And she helped me really get that answer, like figure that out. And so when you asked me early on, like how we came up with success architect, and I said, I help women overcome subconscious blocks. It took me a while to figure out. That's exactly what I've been doing for years is helping women bust through those things that are keeping them paralyzed, keeping them stuck in their lives, their businesses, whatever it is that they're trying to do. And helping them release that and move forward. And so that's what this whole thing has been about. And I think that's what I'm pretty excited about is getting this thing launched. Being actually able to step into what I feel like is my gift, my genius. And really help people get to the root of their problem rather than just slapping band aids and masking symptoms. Yes. Oh my gosh. I love it. Yeah, I'm excited. You can probably tell I'm passionate about it. So exciting. And I, do you feel like that you had some subconscious blocks that you were bumping up against? Oh yeah, I'm getting chills right as you ask me that. So many of them, so many of them. Money. I grew up in a house. I love my parents. But I grew up in a home where we had a lot of toxicity growing up, just a lot of issues wrapped around money for me a lot of issues around self worth. And, I just recently interesting after having all these years of. Being in Mary Kay and being in leadership and having personal development, and it really just going in one ear and out the other. I read a book by Jamie Kern Lima recently called Unworthy. If you read it? Yes. No, that's unworthy. Yes. Okay. One of the very first in the beginning of the book, she talks about the difference. I don't know why I said unworthy, but sidebar that beginning of the book, she talks about the difference between confidence and self worth. And if you think about this, I don't know about you, but me. I never knew those were different until recently. So here all these years I have been working on achievement because I based my worth on all the cool things that I could do, all the achievements that I could do. That's how I was praised growing up. If I did cool things. I got praised for it. If I didn't, I did it. And so I felt the constant need to have to do all these miraculous things, even at the strain of my sanity, my, my health, all of these things. And then I read that chapter and it was like, this light bulb went off. I was like, Not that I hadn't already come to this realization, but it was in words for me. It was right there in words where it was like, no, this is a different thing. Your worth does not come from your achievements. Your worth comes from your value, you valuing you. And so I think for me, that's just been really like a huge. Like eye opener for me and even going forward now and thinking about everything I do. Is this because I want to do it or is it because I think I need an achievement? You see what I'm saying? It's, yeah it's just, yeah, it's intense. Thank you for being so vulnerable. And you are so accomplished and those, I have goosebumps, I'm laughing because I wanted to do the podcast to elevate other women. And because I love podcasting, I listen to podcasts all the time when I'm doing my chores, running errands Folding clothes or whatever. It makes life way more fun from the mundane for me. And what I'm laughing at is it's every conversation I've had with my guests. I'm like, I needed to hear that today. And I'm laughing. So I wanted to do it for others, but clearly there's so much here. And I realized I just got an aha of, I, I think a lot of my life, I haven't. Been seeking validation from all the wrong places, like looking for love and all, and you think of that too, yeah. And there's, I'm a big 12 stepper. I'm in aa, I go to Al-Anon. I've performed for NA conventions I love the 12 step world and it's not perfect and I know for some people it doesn't work, but for a lot of people it's saved millions of lives and I've gotten to be in AA meetings in Czechoslovakia and Vienna and I saw an AA building when I was in Costa Rica in August but one of the things they talk about in SLAA is a lot of people say, I'm a love addict. I'm a fantasy addict, or I'm a validation addict. And when my friend was telling me that, I was when you twitch, like close to home a little bit. And so I can I really think I had confidence and worth. Collapsed until just now. And I've been, I watched her book launch, which was amazing. And now I'm okay, cause somebody sent me her first book, when a book keeps coming at me, I'm okay. I'm going to, I get it. I get it. I'm going to order it today. Yeah, I think. I know for me, Jennifer, growing up, I did not feel worthy and I, and whatever evidence you're looking for, you're going to find. And I wasn't the pretty Dallas Cowboy cheerleader and I wasn't, whatever. And I, so I think I spent so much of my life trying to almost overachieve. And I do love feeling productive. I love ticking things off my list and, and I remember doing, did you ever do mirror work where you look in the mirror and you say, I love you with or without the man with or without the comedy gig with or without, five pounds up or down, and I think it's time for me to do some more to wow. It's a real the word the confidence block that it's, it can form an imposter syndrome. There's a lot of different things, right? And I think all of us struggle. I think it would be foolish for us to say none of us ever deal with any of this. But I think, for me, it's been a process because I tell people like what I am today. I wasn't like this three years ago. I wasn't like this five years ago. I wasn't like this 10 years ago. And I can almost assure you people That would tell you that knew me when I was younger would be like if they hadn't seen me in this transition over the years would be like that is not even the same person, so I think it is a process and I think that for me has come through this continual learning. And this continual need for self improvement, right? But I, my self improvement quest has always really been about finding peace for myself. It's really been about just being okay with who I am. And that's why I did a lot of this. I tell people in the beginning, it all started when I wanted to heal my health. That's really what it was in the beginning. That was like in 2012 for me was like, I don't know, maybe the coming to Jesus moment where it was like, I had no idea that was going to be the mark that was going to turn this into directory. But it was a quest to figure out why I was dealing with this. disease. Like, why did I get plagued with this disease? And it became about how do I solve this problem? I knew I was going to have to live with it. Okay, so now what do we do with it? Because I'm not going to play victim to this, right? And then it really started opening the doors up to how was I contributing to this condition? Like, how was I making this worse or better? And what role did I play in that? And I think that really has just sent me on this And so I think that it's really important to understand that. There is this. Perpetual. Like conquest to not only. Understand myself and my place, but also understand the human condition, why people do what they do. And it's fun even in that because I feel this mentor that I had used to say that, which we think is most personal as most universal that we think we're all have universal problems, but really the core meanings behind a lot of the problems are really universal. If you think about it, we all want love. We all want certain things, and so if you start to really. understand people and you watch them and watch what they do and what they say. And over a period of time, you can start finding patterns. And if you hear that back, you can really start getting back to those blocks that we're talking about, whether it's a confidence thing or it's a money block, or, there's all procrastination. There's a lot of different things. If you think about procrastination, why do we do that? There's a reason we do it, right? There's a self tied to it. Yeah. I always think it's perfectionism. Or I know, like I have trouble with organization and I know that some of my trauma is directly related to that. So it's, yeah, I think I love it because I feel like we're all on this path and when we can work together, it's so much more fun. Like what would it be like if everybody had a coach? I know right people bullying each other or whatever the heck people do, it's what would be possible. That's why I love coaching and mentoring so much because I would be dead. I would be dead without it. I got to my choir director was like a mother to me growing up because my mother took off to Europe and my stepmother was unfortunately was undiagnosed bipolar, lots of trauma from the world war two. And there was really nobody. to advocate for me and she did She saved my life because I think I would have run away if it hadn't been for her. And I'm so happy that I got to tell her that several times, but especially right before she passed. You just never know the impact that somebody can make, but yeah I love it. I can't I want to know all about your high end thing when you roll it out, this is so exciting. Because I think we all have some kind of block. Yeah, there's what is it? new level? New devil? Yeah. It's fun. I'm building. It's funny because here talk about tech. You mentioned tech a while ago. Okay, so I'm building. So the high ticket is built, right? But now I'm doing the backwards. I'm starting from the scratch at the beginning. So I'm building out this course, right? Or excuse me this quiz, a free quiz right now that people are going to be able to go to, to identify their number one subconscious block that's keeping them stuck. Now, obviously we typically have more than one, but we're trying to hone in on what's the big one that's keeping you stuck. And so I'm creating the quiz on type four and I get into this and I'm like, Oh my goodness, Elaine. I'm like, okay, can I just, Either do this or tell me what button to push because I'm like I need help with the questions I get that figured out then I'm like, how do I do the quiz like the variables? Like how do I get the numbers lined out and then I don't know how to do the type form Oh my goodness. I had to get the chat GP to walk me through step by step how to create the type form. And then all of a sudden when it clicked, talk about moment, like you talked, you have the aha moment, it clicked. And I'm like, Oh my gosh, this is stupid. Yeah, it's it's just, yeah, technology. There's always something new. I always tell my students we're gonna laugh so that we don't cry. We're gonna laugh. We gotta laugh. We gotta laugh. Do you want to tell us one client story that is just something that you just love? Yes, I do have a really awesome one. Okay. So most of us are old enough to remember the karate kid. And I always talk about this story kind of being like that. We didn't do any martial arts and we're not, Doing any physical activity, but I have a girl that I have been working with since probably the beginning of COVID. I think she came in around 2019. She's the same age as my oldest almost like their same month, same year, everything. She had reached out to me in 2019. I think it was right the week of Christmas. In fact, she's in Spain. She's originally from Russia, moved into Spain. And she was looking for a coach. She had found me on a platform. And at that time she had just, I think, had a hostel. And when COVID hit, had to shut it down and then started an online. designer bag business and so she was, she came to me and I just remember she was upset because she, something had happened. I can't remember what specifically in her personal life, but one of the things she was struggling with was she said that every time something would happen that was big in her personal life, it would shut her down in her business. She would just emotionally go down. Long story short, I'm going to fast forward this a little bit because I'm still working with her. She's on a, what they call holiday right now. So she's gone traveling. But we had during the course of this training in the beginning, we were working a lot on these success habits. And these were habits that I had implemented. In my life to turn around mine because I had was struggling with a lot of the same things I would go into depression for a long time. I would get into these what I call hyper funks And I couldn't really figure out was it like hormonal was I now know that it was probably diet hormones It was a lot of different things a lot of negative influences in my life But I would shut down and I couldn't function for like weeks and then one day I'd just wake up and i'd be out of it Again, and then I'd pay for what the next one was gonna come, right? You And so anyways, in the beginning with her, I started really just working on these success habits that I had implemented in my life. And I remember her telling me so many times, she's I'm lazy, I'm not going to do these. And I would be like, no, you're not lazy. You just don't see the importance of this yet. And so we just kept sticking with it, kept sticking with it. And we would talk about and I'm a big fan of sustainable change. So I don't believe in doing a lot of things at one time. I think we start small with something and build that up, get you some wins and then move on. So we stuck with it. Now here's the fun thing. Let's fast forward into 2024. I met with her at the beginning of the year and I remember her telling me she was like in 2023 she had her best year. That year she had a flat that she had bought in Spain and was setting it up on Airbnb to get it, to rent it out. She had traveled to Dubai that year, to India that year. She had a poker trainer. She was taking private horse lessons. She had been to Kenya on a safari. She was made, doing incredible. And I'm talking, we're talking in excess of thousands here in her business. Month after month, she was doing really well. And I remember having this conversation and she was like, I had my best year ever. And she said, I think, like it was all those things that we had put into action. It just took us a while for her to actually start realizing that when she wasn't doing these things, they were all, affecting her negatively. And so it's funny because now she's got this little routine and system in place, and when she deviates from it, she realizes that. No, I need to get back on track. And so she's had an incredible journey and it's been fun to watch her growth. It's almost been like this little prodigy child, so to speak, that I've been coaching and watching her evolve as a human being and into this successful business owner. That's amazing. Oh, I love it. I love it so much. Yeah. I, it's always a million tiny steps and sometimes we don't realize they can add up. They can also. Veer us off if we keep going. That's so cool. Yeah. She's not the normal, Elaine, because a lot of people. In coaching you, you know this'cause you're working with people. If they don't always see things immediately happen, they start to believe things don't work and sometimes it takes a while. It's the way I put this, and this will make sense to your people, if you think about their stages of learning things, we have what we call like unconscious incompetence. And then we have, conscious, it goes all the way up when you drive a car. We don't think anything driving a car because that is an unconscious competent activity. Brushing our teeth is an unconscious competent activity, but we've done it for a while. We have done this for a long time that we no longer have to think about it. A lot of times we start things and we think that we should immediately adopt them into our life. It should be easy for us. But it doesn't work that way. It actually don't. Yeah, it's three to four years to build an unconscious competent habit. So when we talk about these 30 day habits in these 90 days, Yeah, they're gonna work, but you're there's a good chance if you break off, you're going to fall off. Okay, because you got to be thinking it takes time to build these habits before they become to a place where you just get up in the morning like I do with my workout and go. I'm working out today. I don't negotiate it. It's part of my life. It's just part of it. I love it. I love it, Jennifer. And I love your speaking. You have such a great pace. You have vocal variety. I love how you pause. You painted the pictures. I, part of me is I can't wait to see you on a stage. Taking up more space and maybe even adding, sometimes it's nice to have dramatic pauses in certain stories, but you're just fabulous. How long have you been doing your podcast So I started the starter girls in 2019. So again, right before COVID hit. And and then I had that, that, Show has taken many twists and turns. It was originally two ex Mary Kay sales directors all about empowering the female entrepreneur. And then it was funny because you're probably like, I am, I found that I was also, I get along with men very well. Like I just can, I can be that optimist practical person, and so I was like. Dude, I want to bring men on the show and interview them too. And so we've had a lot of twists and turns and that's why you probably saw that I had the behind the dreamers come out because we bridged a new show and decided to take a more neutral, stance on it. And then I finally just decided this past year that You know, starter girls is where the brand is. It's where we built it. People like it. It's a cute logo. It just sparks like the conversation of what is that all about? And so I hybrided those back together. And so now it's still about empowering women, but I bring men on cause we're celebrating dreamers too. And so I bring them in and I feel like what they have to offer, some of it is relevant to us as well in the business world. And so yeah, I'm having fun with that, with the show now. I love it. I love it. So if people want to find you, where is the best place to send them? Yeah, you can, I would say go to my main page, which is the jenniferloading. com. I'm assuming you'll put some show notes in there. Absolutely. Yeah. With all your stuff. Yeah, just that's the main hub page. I have pages for the starter girls and all of that, but if you go to that will direct you to all of my work. And awesome. Thank you so much for taking the time out of your busy schedule. And I needed to hear exactly what you had to say today. So I can't thank you enough. And yeah, make sure everybody follow her. Cause she's moving and shaking. She's going lots of cool places. Thank you so much, Jennifer. Thank you, Elaine. Appreciate you.